I started reading the Tools by Phil Stutz and Barry Michels. It’s a book about transforming your problems into courage, confidence and creativity. I was intrigued by reading this book after watching the Netflix documentary, Stutz (summary).
Coincidentally, I have been enamored with Shrinking, a series on Apple TV+. A lot of what the main character does in shrinking seems to be how Phil Stutz works with his patients.
In Tools, both authors cover the tools they used in their rather unconventional practice.
A tool is much more than an “attitude adjustment”. If changing your life we’re only a matter of adjusting your attitude, you would need this book. Real change requires you change your behavior - not just your attitude. A new attitude means nothing unless followed by a change in behavior. The surest way to change behavior is with a tool.
I normally take copious notes on the books I read, and then summarize the book, either in a short presentation, or in a summary post. This is where ChatGPT comes to my aid these days. Here’s how artificial intelligence summarizes the book and its tools:
“The Tools” by Phil Stutz and Barry Michels is a self-help book that presents a set of practical and accessible tools to help readers overcome their personal and professional obstacles and achieve their goals. The book is based on the authors’ experience as therapists, and the tools presented are designed to be used in everyday life to cultivate a stronger sense of empowerment and fulfillment.
The book is divided into five sections, with each section presenting a set of tools:
Section 1: The Reversal of Desire
- The Grateful Flow - This tool involves focusing on the things you’re grateful for in your life, which can help you shift your perspective and increase
- Active Love - This tool involves actively choosing to love someone or something, even if you don’t feel like it in the moment. This can help you open yourself up to positive experiences and relationships. -Inner Authority - This tool involves recognizing and embracing your own inner authority, or sense of power and control. By tapping into this authority, you can overcome self-doubt and fear.
Section 2: The Expansion
- Jeopardy - This tool involves placing yourself in situations where you are forced to take risks and face your fears. This can help you expand your comfort zone and build confidence.
- The Inner Conductor - This tool involves visualizing a conductor inside you that directs your actions and emotions. By imagining this inner conductor, you can learn to control your thoughts and feelings.
- Micro-Shifts - This tool involves making small, incremental changes in your behavior and mindset. These micro-shifts can add up to significant progress over time.
Section 3: The Relinquishing
- The Death Ground - This tool involves facing your fear of failure or loss by imagining the worst-case scenario. By embracing the possibility of failure or loss, you can reduce your fear and take action.
- The Diving Board - This tool involves taking a leap of faith and committing to a goal or decision. By jumping off the metaphorical “diving board,” you can overcome indecision and move forward.
- Emotional Objectivity - This tool involves recognizing and controlling your emotional reactions. By remaining objective in the face of emotional challenges, you can make more rational decisions.
Section 4: The Receptivity
- Reversal of the Ego - This tool involves embracing your vulnerability and accepting help from others. By letting go of your ego, you can build stronger relationships and achieve more.
- The Stonecutter - This tool involves imagining yourself as a stonecutter, chiseling away at your obstacles and achieving your goals. By visualizing this process, you can stay motivated and focused.
- The Lightening Bolt - This tool involves tapping into your intuition and taking immediate action based on a sudden insight or inspiration. By trusting your intuition, you can make bold and decisive moves.
Section 5: The Inheritance
- The Grid - This tool involves creating a visualization of your ideal life, with specific goals and milestones. By imagining this “grid,” you can stay focused and motivated.
- The Life Force - This tool involves recognizing and connecting with the energy that animates all living things. By tapping into this energy, you can feel more alive and inspired.
- The Ultimate Toolkit - This tool involves integrating all the tools from the book into your daily life. By using these tools regularly, you can build resilience, overcome obstacles, and achieve your goals.
Overall, the book offers a variety of tools and exercises that can be used to break through personal and professional limitations, gain greater self-awareness and insight, and achieve a more fulfilling life.
February 20, 2023
Thank You for Helping Me Earn My Ticket to Ride
In October, I committed to riding the 2023 AIDS LifeCycle ride. In addition to getting ready physically and mentally to endure the 545 miles from SF to LA, I also had to fundraise a minimum of $3500. At the time, it looked like an immense amount of money.
Fast forward to February. I just earned my ticket to ride. As I write this, my fundraising total stands at $3898.40.
I am humbled, amazed, and especially thankful for all the contributions, small and big, from the many donors. These funds are going to a great cause.
Now that I earned my ticket to ride, I will also hold up my side of the bargain, and make it from San Francisco to Los Angeles. I am training hard. Today took us into the Stevens Creek Canyon and over Mount Eden: 36 miles and about 1900 ft of climbing. Each weekend, our team lead is increasing the mileage by 5-10 miles. We’ll end up just under 100 miles, before we head out to ride around the beautiful Lake Tahoe.
Thank you and pedal on!
February 18, 2023
ALC2023
Shrinking
The actor Jason Segel seems like a great and nice guy. Too nice. Too likable. Ted Lasso likable. In more serious roles, I rarely find him believable. I have a hard time disconnecting him from the goofy role in How I met your mother.
In Apple TV+’s Shrinking he has find the perfect combination of seriousness and comedy. He is both the show co-creator and plays the lead role of Jimmy, a cognitive behavioral therapist crushed by personal grief. He decides to try a new approach with everyone in his path: unfiltered, brutal honesty.
The show is similar to Ted Lasso, that it is like a warm blanket, except for the silly Ted-isms. It comes across as authentic, funny, and moving. I give it 5 stars, 5 Persian carpets, and plenty of rotten tomatoes.
February 12, 2023
A Ride of a Lifetime Reads Like Walking Along Squeaky Clean Main Street in Disney Land
A Ride of a Lifetime is Bob Iger’s autobiography as a CEO of Walt Disney corporation. It hits the expected high notes of his career: a career that took him from ABC television to Disney, and during which he oversaw the acquisitions of Pixar, Marvel, Lucasfilm, and 21st Century Fox. As a business book, it obligatorily spells out Bob Iger’s ten leadership principles. Although they were a bit generic: be optimistic, strive for excellence, focus, have high integrity, etc.
One of the surprises reading the book was his close relationship with Steve Jobs, after the acquisition of Pixar.
ChatGPT summarizes the book as
“Ride of a Lifetime: Lessons Learned from 15 Years as CEO of the Walt Disney Company” is a memoir by Bob Iger, the former CEO of Walt Disney. In the book, Iger reflects on his journey leading one of the world’s largest media and entertainment companies. He shares stories of challenges and successes, detailing key decisions and their consequences, including the acquisitions of Pixar, Marvel, Lucasfilm, and 21st Century Fox. He also covers his philosophy on leadership, innovation, and corporate culture, offering insights into the strategies that helped him steer Disney through rapid technological changes in the media industry. The book is both a personal account of Iger’s tenure and a broader exploration of the challenges facing businesses in the 21st century.
The book, released in 2019, comes across as a prelude to a potential presidential run. That run may never come now that Bob came out of retirement and returned to Disney at the age of 71, replacing his successor Bob Chapek. The book reads like walking along squeaky clean main street in Disneyland: an optimistic story with little controversy or true conflict. There were a few tough times nevertheless, such as the shooting at the Pulse nightclub in Orlando or the death of a toddler at DisneyWorld. Of course, as an autobiography, you can expect some of the unflattering parts will be left out. Especially, if, while writing it, you may be contemplating a run for the US presidency.
I wish there was a bit background about what didn’t go so well in his career. ChatGPT reminds me of several controversies he faced during his tenure as CEO of Walt Disney, that didn’t come up in the book: executive pay, ESPN layoffs, political donations, treatment of James Gunn (the fired director of the Guardians of the Galaxy). I am not necessarily looking for a backstory on every controversie. I was looking for his experiences as a leader or executive when things were more messy, periods of uncertainty or when he doubted himself.
Bob does explain how he approaches every challenge as a problem or puzzle to solve. Yet, his puzzle solving comes across as a perfect trajectory: and then I did this, and, while I didn’t think it would not necessarily work, it did. Sprinkle some Disney Magic and voila.
Regardless, I loved reading the book. His writing and verbal communication style in interviews is simple, precise, and clear. I like his style. It is also a style befitting a statesman and US president.
February 5, 2023
A Wet January Meant a Slow Start to the Training
January started slowly with only a few rides, while dodging the rain drops. Overall, I worked out for almost 14 hours, completed 28 workouts of all sorts, completed 5 rides (125 miles), and broke 71 personal records. I am getting stronger.
The team is also nicely coming together. I read that almost 40 of the South Bay Blaze will participate this year in the ride to Los Angeles. 
Not only do we ride together, there was a great team showing at the South Bay happy hour and the NorCal AIDS/Lifecycle Expo in San Francisco. The Expo was a great place for newbies to learn about the ride and to get some free gear, donated by Pedal It Forward. I got a lot of great training jerseys and cold weather gear.
The team bicycle clinic was amazing with a lot of tips, tricks, and gear to fix and maintain the bike. I got most of the missing gear since from Amazon. I also learned how to deal with tubeless tires.
Also the fundraising is making good progress. I raised a tad over $3000, well on my way to the $3500 to push my ticket to Los Angeles. Thank you to all my sponsors; your money is going to a great cause.
February 3, 2023
ALC2023
Don’t Mess With the Garvey Sisters
Although Apple TV+ has a more limited offering than other streaming services, the quality appears to be consistently high.
In the midst of the pandemic, it was Ted Lasso who made us smile and made us believe. The show put Apple TV+ on the map. The Morning Show was a strong second course. We became regulars with For All Mankind, Physical, Acapulco, and Surface. Most recently, we were awaiting the release of new weekly episodes of Slow Horses, the dark English spy series.
Yet, no show has elicited more reaction in our household as Bad Sisters. A recreation of the Flemish TV show, Clan, the show is about the Garvey sisters’ attempt to help their sister in her marriage to John Paul. We all felt a deep and growing hatred towards John Paul and wanted him to die, soon.
It is now common to hear my daughter shout out ”You mad bitch! or ”Hug me, you cow”. Yet, we are forbidden by my wife to call her ”Mammy”. Apparently, a second season of the Garvey sisters is on the way.
January 14, 2023
Bob Iger Should Give John Stewart a Conkrite Audience and a Will McAvoy Mission.
I’ve been a fan of Bob Iger and admire his communication style. The Eisner era was full of troubled waters. When Bob Iger took the rudder, he steadied the pirate ship.
Now that he is back at Disney, after a short Chapek hiatus, it is now also clear he is not going to run for president of the United States. Many have suggested he would have been a great candidate. Instead, he is going to sunset at the happiest place on earth, (in a parallel universe from the Desantis’ Florida.)
The Disney conglomerate includes ABC and ABC news. So, if Bob Iger isn’t running for president, he does still have an opportunity to make a big impact on the US democracy by fixing news.
To do so, he will need to be a bit more daring than World News with David Muir. Those shows appear heavily sanitized, and then run one more time through a bleach bath for good measure. The news needs to be a bit more hard hitting and critical.
And I know just the person who Bob should be hiring - assuming he is willing to rock the boat a bit, and not be as concerned about the squeaky clean Disney image. John Stewart.
This video might as well been a job interview. It is part of a bigger Apple TV+ segment on The News is broken. John Stewart clearly has evolved from the Comedy Central jokester to a hard hitting journalist.
Let’s give John Stewart a bigger forum, a Conkrite audience, and a Will McAvoy mission.
Make no mistake. This will not be a profitable endeavor. Yet, with a few good truly altruistic donors, it will be a dent in democracy mission. It will have a bigger impact on the US and the world than any presidential run.
January 8, 2023
Essay
The Age of the Essay is one of my favorite reads recently, even though it was written almost ten years ago. It describes what an essay should all be about.
To understand what a real essay is, we have to reach back into history again, though this time not so far. To Michel de Montaigne, who in 1580 published a book of what he called “essais.” He was doing something quite different from what lawyers do, and the difference is embodied in the name. Essayer is the French verb meaning “to try” and an essai is an attempt. An essay is something you write to try to figure something out. Figure out what? You don’t know yet. And so you can’t begin with a thesis, because you don’t have one, and may never have one. An essay doesn’t begin with a statement, but with a question. In a real essay, you don’t take a position and defend it. You notice a door that’s ajar, and you open it and walk in to see what’s inside.
Growing up we rarely had to write an essay. Our writing assignments were more infrequent than the writings my kids had to produce throughout high school and university. I can’t even recall the papers I had to write in university, beyond my thesis on the design and implementation of an ISDN Power Fail Unit for a Private Automatic Branch Exchange (PABX), to be used in emergency situations. Writing essays and papers is something quite popular in the US educational system and I applaud it.
I’ve been spending a lot more time writing in recent years in a professional setting. I am not in marketing, publishing, nor do I make a living writing. I use it to better my thinking and to be more a succinct and clear communicator. I ask questions and try to answer them.
The Meander (aka Menderes) is a river in Turkey. As you might expect, it winds all over the place. But it doesn’t do this out of frivolity. The path it has discovered is the most economical route to the sea. The river’s algorithm is simple. At each step, flow down. For the essayist this translates to: flow interesting. Of all the places to go next, choose the most interesting. One can’t have quite as little foresight as a river. I always know generally what I want to write about. But not the specific conclusions I want to reach; from paragraph to paragraph I let the ideas take their course. This doesn’t always work. Sometimes, like a river, one runs up against a wall. Then I do the same thing the river does: backtrack. At one point in this essay I found that after following a certain thread I ran out of ideas. I had to go back seven paragraphs and start over in another direction. Fundamentally an essay is a train of thought– but a cleaned-up train of thought, as dialogue is cleaned-up conversation. Real thought, like real conversation, is full of false starts. It would be exhausting to read. You need to cut and fill to emphasize the central thread, like an illustrator inking over a pencil drawing. But don’t change so much that you lose the spontaneity of the original.
Asking questions and meandering through potential answer appears natural to me. However, my struggle with my writing has been capturing a surprising ending, or at least a surprise of some magnitude.
Essays should aim for maximum surprise.
David Sedaris does this brilliantly. What starts as an ordinary page out of his journals, blossoms into an amazing, surprising, shocking or sometimes embarrassing ending.
The pressure of discovering something new, being contrarian, describing a funny insight, or just ending with a surprise, can be paralyzing. Not every river leads to the discovery of a hidden city, and just boringly flow into the ocean. The challenge is to keep being on the lookout what happens on the banks of the river or under water. I’ll keep essayer.
January 7, 2023
Podcast Spring Cleaning
A quiet time on the beach, over the holidays, allowed me to clean up my podcast list. Some downloaded episodes had been collecting digital dust for over a year.
Here’s the list of the podcasts I am listening to - mostly while doing chores or training on my bicycle. Ideally a podcast is 30-40 minutes long. The Huberman Lab podcast needs its own podcast Huberman Lab Summarized. With episodes of over 3 hours, they are really lectures more than a podcast.
Business and Tech Industry
- Founders
- Securities
- My First Million (my favorite podcast)
- Pivot
- Work Life
- The Indicator
- MIK+One
Health
- Maintenance Phase
- Huberman Lab
Sports
- De Tribune (VRT Max) (in Dutch)
Culture
- This American Life
- The Problem with Jon Stewart
News
Comedy
- Wait wait don’t tell me
- Netflix is a daily joke
Exploring
I haven’t made up my mind about a few recently discovered podcasts:
- Invest like the best
- Slow Burn
- What you will learn
- Where it happens
- Zoe Science and Nutrition
- Life Made Simple
Need
I am looking for some more sub-30 minutes comedy podcasts. I am also in need of way to easily save podcast time stamps. “Hey Siri, note this podcast time stamp”.
January 1, 2023
